I am not really sure why I am writing my story but I guess maybe if I put my feelings to paper i might feel better.
In June 2010 just as the soccer world cup started we got a yorkie of 8 weeks old. Names were between zakumi and Vespa. So Vespa came into our lives and became my best friend.
He was like my shadow. I was working for a corporate company back then and took him with me to work for weeks, so he became really attached to me and followed every step I took.
He has been every where, he has flown with us to Cape Town, he’s been in every province with us, he travelled every where with us, he was like our child, we don’t have kids. Everybody knows Vespa.
When he was still a baby, many times I thought to myself what am I going to do when this dog die one day….and I cried then already…as the years passed and I realised how tough he was, I let go of my fear….until 3 weeks ago.
We went away for the weekend for a wedding, and unfortunately the dogs couldn’t go with, my inlaws were to come stay with our 4 year old godson in our house.
We had no cellphone signal at the venue. On our return the Sunday, we were so excited to be home again to see our kids, but was told my our inlaws that Vespa has drowned, they found him in our fountain after 3 weeks of tremendous non stop rain, our fountain which was always empty and has never ever worked had become full and apparently he must have slipped and fallen into it.
I was in total shock and denial when I got the news. In the next 15 minutes they showed me his body and I sat with him for an hour sobbing and sobbing and sobbing….as if I just stay long enough his horror story might be over.
So an hour later we got in the car with my friend in a box in the boot to go bury. By this time i was besides myself and crying histerically, here I am driving looking for a spot to bury my friend, no Vespa running around in the car, or sitting on my shoulder when I drive.
We found the most beautiful spot to bury him. He would have loved the lush green valley. Its on my way to work and on my way back again. I stopped there everyday, when i was there i look at the spot as I miss him so dearly as if he is coming back, but every time i leave his grave its like cold water in my face – he is gone forever.
He was only 3,5 years old. I must admit it was the best years of my life, and we really lived it to the full for which I am so grateful.
Next week he will be gone 1 month, it was a very tough month for us, dealing with this huge huge loss. Somehow I manage to accept it but not completely yet….its a tough journey that i take day for day….not sure if I ever want to go through this again….I miss him every day. I miss him when I go up the stairs he use to race me and he always won….when I did my hair he sat on my feet, when I woke up in the morning, he rushed up the stairs to come greet me first then it was playtime…I trust God will heal my heart, because I became depressed the past weeks, and really have to find a way to get over this and fall in love with life again.
Simply click here to return to Grieving for your Dog.
Your little one
I`m so sorry for your lost.You are right they are like our kids.
It’s painful to read , because I totally can feel what you are feeling. I m grieving for 3 weeks now for my 11 year old Yorkie, and could not find motivation to do anything other than looking at his old pictures and videos over and over again. Like you, I am depressed and would still tear up the moment I think of him. I pray I can get out of this depressed feeling and pray I want to get out of it.